Tuesday, September 28
Fresh From The OvenHey guys give me your opinion about my latest release, because I’m planning to enter a competition with some minor adjustments to this poem;
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Just a plain disposable lighter
____________________________
The night we parted you held me gently
And in my palm you placed a lighter
Then in my ear you whispered softly
Keep this….. as the last reminder
____________________________
The night we parted you held me gently
And in my palm you placed a lighter
Then in my ear you whispered softly
Keep this….. as the last reminder
**********
I place my tooth brush in a glass
I keep within my reach
The plastic one you were holding
That night we partied at the beach
*********
Next to the toothbrush, in the same glass
Another brush "still wrapped” there lay
The one I got you when you were away
But to use, you never had the chance
*********
And when I open my closet door
Your T–Shirt greets me sadly
The one I got you on my last tour
And you never received; unfortunately
*********
When I pass the cabinet border
The candle holder winks with class
Not actually a candle holder
But a candle in a crystal glass
*********
Remember the night you and I
At a friend's "after party" Slammed
Remember when you winked your eye
As your hand a laptop scanned
Remember the " Karma Sutra" scene
You scrolled on that screen,
And whispered to my delight
This is what we'll do tonight
*********
And remember when we left later
In your hand a crystal glass
This glass is my candle holder
The one that winks every time I pass
*********
And now you leave me with a lighter
The same plain disposable lighter
Give me something to forget
I don't need another reminder
*********
This last token to me symbolized
The acidic defeat of a born fighter
When I finally realized
That I was nothing but a diposable lighter
I place my tooth brush in a glass
I keep within my reach
The plastic one you were holding
That night we partied at the beach
*********
Next to the toothbrush, in the same glass
Another brush "still wrapped” there lay
The one I got you when you were away
But to use, you never had the chance
*********
And when I open my closet door
Your T–Shirt greets me sadly
The one I got you on my last tour
And you never received; unfortunately
*********
When I pass the cabinet border
The candle holder winks with class
Not actually a candle holder
But a candle in a crystal glass
*********
Remember the night you and I
At a friend's "after party" Slammed
Remember when you winked your eye
As your hand a laptop scanned
Remember the " Karma Sutra" scene
You scrolled on that screen,
And whispered to my delight
This is what we'll do tonight
*********
And remember when we left later
In your hand a crystal glass
This glass is my candle holder
The one that winks every time I pass
*********
And now you leave me with a lighter
The same plain disposable lighter
Give me something to forget
I don't need another reminder
*********
This last token to me symbolized
The acidic defeat of a born fighter
When I finally realized
That I was nothing but a diposable lighter
Ruby
Name::AyyA
From::Kuwait
I AM WHO I AM AS I ARRIVE AT YOUR DOOR WHETHER I COME OR I GO IS NOT UP TO ME FOR I HAVE LOST SIGHT OF ALL DESIRE "Walled Garden of Truth",Hakim Sanai
View my complete profile
6 Comments:
Thanx Tesh
Ur comment being the first means a lot to me
I'm blessed with the ability to appreciate fine poetry yet cursed for I cannot create my own. The same with music, I can appreciate it and seperate the treasures from the trash but when it's my turn to play an instrument, not one single note is even remotely acceptable.
I loved your recent poem! It's sad but in a romantic way it's quite beautiful as well. I know that you already know this but you're extremely talented! Please allow me to be your friend :)
As for your blog, I'm asking myself this right now. Why did I never think to click on your nick and explore your blog before? I'm glad that I did now, though.
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Dear Drunk'n'Gordeous
your words brought tears to my eyes, I've always had this passion for poetry, and it's an essential part of my life, but who reads poetry?… I was about to abandon my blog.
Although I asked a lot of my friends to post their comments because this world competition is very important to me, yet no one seems to be interested in poetry.
But, reading ur comment, unexpectedly, was… honestly a shock.
Thanks for the encouragement FREIND, it boosted my morals. And.. no I never considered myself really talented, and until now I'm not very happy with my poems and this is one of the reasons why I postponed publishing my own book.
I wish that you always make this mistake and show up in my blog… welcome friend.
At first it was a mistake, but now I'm going to PURPOSELY check your blog for new posts so you better update frequently :P
As for poetry, if it's bad, of course people won't read it but trust me, my newly acquired friend, you won't have to worry about the quality of your work because it's as good as they come, if not better!
I hope you don't mind, but I added your blog to my blogs list on my blog. I noticed that your blog wasn't on the list Nibaq made. Was there a reason for this? If so, please let me know so that I will remove your blog from my list but 'till then, I'm keeping it :)
Keep up the great work, and hey, maybe you might even rub off on me and I'll be able to write a poem of my own haha
Ok, take care sweetie.
Dear D&G
I am honored to be on your list of blogs. And about the other list” Nibaq made”; I have no idea what are you talking about. I’m new in the blogging bussiness, and learning something new every day. Please nawreeni. I’m still struggling to add some photos on my blog to make it more presentable.
And as for poetry;
I started writing long back, but my poems always ended up in the garbage.
But when I started my e-mailing thingy; as a funny gesture, I replied my friends with rhyming type a’ mail. Most of then encouraged me to write, and one of them was sooo keen about it and sent me web sites to get into competitions and connect with critics, and so on. Now I’m really grateful for what she has done. So you never know may be someday you’ll start writing and I will be the one behind it ;)
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