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Friday, October 29

Does Being Altruistic Mean Being Alone



When you are a constant giver, or what my blogging buddy"AltruisticDad" explained as being an altruistic person, you feel you're alone. You have the heart to accept all and appreciate all, but sadly no one understands you, let alone accepts you.
This is sad. You can't stop yourself or change your beliefs, or even pretend to be someone you are not. The society tries constantly to change you; either by offering advice or by force. But you have to be true to yourself. Material things in life become just a means to have a decent life, not a luxury. What you yearn for is only love; Love of god, love of humanity, love of the thought. For the true happiness that you experience is through giving, not taking, and the only thing that you would ask for is acceptance for who you are.
Most of the bloggers I think fit in this altruistic category, especially the ones that keep the trend, or else why should they bother to reach others. They are not selfish people, on the contrary, they burn to light the pavement for others, they respect the mind, and they care to share.
I urge the bloggers to continue sharing and know that although you do feel the loneliness within, you are not alone.
You all know that these words came from my heart, and I'm sure and positive that it would reach your hearts.
For poetry lovers this is a poem I've written some years back and it may need some altering here and there, but I like to share it with you anyway, enjoy:

Big Heart

Complimented me indeed
when you said I had a big heart
To that notion I agreed
But to me the saddest part

The den inside is so enormous
It can lodge the universe
Nature to me is overwhelming
Can't overlook or diverse

Humans precede it all
No prejudices to a race
for only I perceive a soul
That upholds abundant grace

With all I sympathize
Feel the pain through their eyes
never hate or criticize
Beliefs I can not compromise

You think that I should be happy
An' satisfied by my deed!
On the contrary, I'm in misery
Of the ugly human greed

Hurt are the closest around,
Traits they can not understand
faking is what they demand
A dedication I can not stand

Some want me to be a puppet
or silence my word and cuff it
But as if a bird with no attachments
Through my thoughts I flee free
Can't enclose myself in
And here is what agonizes me:

Loneliness, yes my friend I suffer
For denoting such a noble offer

Copyright: R. Khaja2001
Posted by Hello



Posted by AyyA:: at :: 11:37 AM:: 19 comments

Wednesday, October 27

Speak Your Mind

 Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 8:30 PM:: 14 comments

Why Moroccan girls?

. Posted by Hello

I have noticed lately that a lot of Kuwaiti guys hang around and date Moroccan girls. Not only that, some also stay in a long term relationship while others end up marrying the ones they dated although it's against their principles to marry a girl he's been with before marriage. Some even travel specifically to Morocco to meet those girls.
Every time I open this subject with a guy, I see a big smile on his face, why?
Don't misunderstand my point, I'm not prejudice against any nationality, but from the stories I hear (some from my friends) that girls from that nationality have a special appeal. And from what I've seen, they don't seem to be any different from other Arabian women, so what is the secret? Why is it becoming almost a trend? Now don't tell me because they are more available while other girls are not, we all know that this is not true. Not in this generation anyway

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 1:39 AM:: 15 comments

Monday, October 25

I LUV U



Happy birthday to you my love….
This is dedicated to my son for today is his birthday

My Prince

When I start thinking of you
I forget all friends and foe
Fireworks start ahead
Blowing my ego and id

When I start thinking of you
My temperature rises too
My hands get freezing cold
while sweat invades each fold

When I start thinking of you
Tingling sensations are due
All excitements in universe
I pour out in a single verse

When I start thinking of you
I'd bet you do feel it too
In my ear I hear heartbeats
Starving guts forget to feast

I live within you my youth
You're the only shining truth
Of all lost years, but a single stance
The moment you were born was my real romance
My dear prince, my flamboyance Posted by Hello

Copyright: Ruby2004
This post is selectively dedicated to my son, no comments are needed, thanx

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 5:51 AM:: 0 comments

Sunday, October 24

A Blissful Day


Today was a good day for me
I woke up in the morning very active, unlike the usual Saturday gloominess. Went to the office, and there on the floor it was waiting for me. A cup I got for participating in a poetry competition with the international poet's library, and a medallion. As well as, a one year membership in the international poet's society, and a title of the international poet of merit for the year 2004.
Waw .. That was really an exuberant way to start a day.

And since I was fully activated I thought I'd pay my mom a visit. A task I have been postponing for two years since she disowned me mainly for not being a norm in this reserved society. I have gone to the big house once before and stayed in my car for 20 min hesitating to get in, this time I told myself I'm going to do it. And I did it. It was not easy and I had to take a lot of shit from her, but I told her that this is the way I am. I'm sure she is not satisfied yet, but what matters is that I hugged her on my way out, kissed her head, and told her no matter what you are my mom and I love you.
Waw.. That was a relief.

Then I came home to my PC and guess who was on the MSN? sweet, sugar.. D&G. she was waiting for me to show me how to do my "best blog links" on the sideboard of my blog; a task I've been fumbling with for sometimes now and frustrated me. And still couldn't do it. So the angle did it herself for me
Waw.. now I can go to my favorite blogs with a click of my mouse.

To top it up another thing happened but I'm not going to mention it here for two reasons; one is because it's too personal, another reason is to leave some room for your imagination
Ching ching
Posted by Hello


Posted by AyyA:: at :: 1:27 AM:: 16 comments

Friday, October 22

Fortune Telling


Do you believe in fortune telling, do you go see some one to read your coffee cup, or spread the sea shells ( wada3)
Well, I have this habit of flipping my first morning coffee cup in the office. Not that I know how to read future, but I just do it. And the funny thing is that every person that drops in my office asks 'bout it and I tell them I just do it as a habit.
So the guest tents to show me his know how and offers to read it… waw, I say, make my day.
Some times I have more than one guest reading the same cup (at different timings of course) and I end up with three different versions, each one contradicting the other.
And you wana know a secret; some of these quests are VIP's who drop in for serious business matters.
This reminds me of a personal story that happened when I was a student in UT, USA.
We were asked by the administrators of the university to participate in "The International Student's day" by designing a booth that reflected the culture and heritage of our home country. And since the Arabs in the university (at the time) hardly counted to a dozen, we decided to have one booth for the Arabs and called it the Arabian night.
We managed to put together a tent, and a (dowa), and a (dallah). And some posters were scattered here and there. Girls wore (dara3a and thoob), guys wore (dishdasha), some Palestinian girls wore their Palestinian national outfits, and that was it.
But when the exhibition started we were astonished to find out that all the other booths were much nicer, and more sophisticated than ours, and people crowded on other booths while our booth was hardly visited if not, by some lost wayfarer who dropped in to have a cup of coffee.
And since the university was offering the best booth a trophy, and this was calculated by the approximate head count on each booth, we had to come up with something quickly before the day was over.
It was then when a friend of mine (another q8i) and I, thought of the wonder world of fortune telling that no one else have thought of.
And who was to do the fortune telling? Me.
I have never done that in my life, and did not know how to do it, but I have heard about some basic concepts of sea shell spreading ( wada3) so I thought I'd give it a try since no one else was ready to take the burden.
So we managed to post a sign on the tent with the caption( fortune telling, the Arabian way) with a huge arrow pointing to me sitting crossed legs on the ground with sea shells scattered in front of me.
In no time the booth got crowded with people that in the middle of December I started sweating and asked every one to queue up. The queue was getting longer and longer; it even reached the door of the stadium where the exhibition took place and I don't know where it ended outside.
I gave each person 10 min only and was panting by the time the day ended.
The funny thing is that they all believed my rubbish, to the point that I started believing myself.
Not mentioning the reputation I got afterwards, and the people who came to see me and beg me to foretell for them.
And ah….. of course we got the trophy.
Ching ching
Posted by Hello


Posted by AyyA:: at :: 4:19 PM:: 12 comments

Thursday, October 21

Tick Tock Goes the Clock




Another poet is yet to be discovered

This is the poem D&G gave me to be reviewed by the critics, and after reviewing it myself I rated her 3/5, and she said I did that because I was her friend. Now the results are here, and it turned out that I have given her the lowest rating although she deserved more.

The poem:

Recess
(Dedicated to my friend Rabab)

I watch the clock
it ticks and tocks
learning LEARNING
ignites my yearning
to go out and play
every which way

Paper airplanes fly here and there
I look at the the teacher, she does't care!
Tick Tock goes the clock

I stiffle a giggle, as she tucks in a squiggle
back into her chignon, and moves on
Quarter to two, I don't know about you
but I can't wait any longer
and it's not just about the hunger

She askes a question,
She calls on me,
the clock chimes TWO,
I run outside with glee!

Copyright Drunk&Gorgious, 2004

Reviews

Review:
this was very whimsical it moved me to childhood and the joys of then. Well as for the poetry itself it needs to be refined just a bit. There are a few errors that can be quickly fixed. Capitalizing learning in the first stanza took away from the gentleness of your poetry, 2nd stanza 2nd line there is a misspelled word "does't" and finally hunger at 1:45? Were you not fed at lunch? Or does the hunger mean learning? It was a nice poem, needs some tweaking but other than that I still rate it a 5. I do not take off for 3 or less typed errors heck we all make mistakes I do hope that this review is of great help to you and you will fix the problems that I have mentioned

Reviewed by
Christina V
(Expert Level)
Rated: 5/5


Review:
Tell your friend that she should keep writing! The poem is upbeat with vivid memories of waiting for the bell to move on.
This poem has a good flow.

Reviewed by
deeski
(Master Level)
Rated: 5/5

Review:
This is perfect for a first time piece. It was that sort of nursery rhyme kind of piece, but it was great. I would like to know how old your friend is, but tell her to keep writing

Reviewed by
JADAQUIN2000
(Expert Level)
Rated: 4/5

Review:
N i c e p o e m, w e l l w r i t t e n.
G o o d j o b, k e e p w r i t i n g.

Reviewed by
empire
(Master Level)
Rated : 4/5

Review:
This really is good for a first timer. She does appear to have talent and I am glad you're encouraging her. We all need that. Nicely written with good imagery.

Reviewed by
abby
(National Judge Advocate)
Rated : 5/5


Review:
I loved this poem. It has this playful and whimsical innocence to it. It made me smile and took me back to my own days of elementary school and the fun I use to have at recess. Encourage your friend to keep writing, she is very talented indeed.

Reviewed by
Nickles
(Talented Level)

Rated: 5/5

Reviewer Rankings and Requirements

Reviewers are rated by Gavels as follows:
Title Star Rank Experience


Scholar Less than 10 Gavels At least 1 month
Proficient 11-35 Gavels At least 1 month
Experienced 36-60 Gavels At least 1 month
Skilled 61-100 Gavels At least 3 months
Talented 101-300 Gavels At least 3 months
Gifted 301-400 Gavels At least 3 months
Professional 401-500 Gavels At least 6 months
Expert 501-750 Gavels At least 6 months
Master 751-1000 Gavels At least 6 months
Judge Advocate 1001-3000 Gavels At least 6 months
National Judge Advocate More than 3000 Gavels At least 9 months

D&G; do you still think that I have been biased to you because I'm your friend?
Let me tell you girl; YOU ARE TALENTED Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 2:18 AM:: 6 comments

Tuesday, October 19

No Comment

Posted by Hello


Posted by AyyA:: at :: 3:06 PM:: 16 comments

Sunday, October 17

To Yamuslim

Posted by Hello


Tamer Saleh
[Yamuslim] تقبل الله منا و منكم
Oct 15
11KB
majed al-ahmed
[Yamuslim] البرنامج اليومي للمسلمة الرمضا...
Oct 15
17KB
majed al-ahmed
[Yamuslim] باب الريان
Oct 15
24KB
charmy man
[Yamuslim] المجلس الثاني من مجالس رمضان
Oct 15
30KB
charmy man
[Yamuslim] مجالسُ شهرِ رمضانَ - المجلس ال...
Oct 15
35KB
الفجر" "الباسم" "قاد...
[Yamuslim] مواعيد برامج الاستاذ عمرو خالد...
Oct 16
13KB

It's been over a year now since I had my hot mail clogged with e-mails from the " YaMuslim" group. And there are so many of them sending e-mails I'm not interested in. I tried so many times to reply to some of them "and there are so many, you hardly can keep up with ", begging them pleeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaase stop. I'm not interested; when I need a religious lecture I can go to the mosque it's only one block away from where I live, but no use. I even sent a guy a message saying I'm not a Muslim, so shove off…. Mako fayda. I don't know how in the hell they got a hold of my e-mail. Why meeeeeee!
This is a known psychological trick and I know they are trying to brain wash me. I gave up sending any messages and just ended up emptying their mails into my trash.
So guys if any of you belong to that group and are reading my post, this is the last time I'm going to be polite, please stop, it doesn't work with me, with all my respect to your views. I'm not INTERESTED.
This posting is only informative, no comments needed

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 3:52 PM:: 0 comments

Saturday, October 16

A Poet is Yet to be Discovered




On oct.11, I posted a poem for an anonymous. One of the blogging friends; Purgatory72 commented with a poem that came to his mind after reading my post. As far as I know, this person has never tried to write poetry before, and what he wrote was just a mere feeling he put on paper right there and then. Personally, I'm not a fan of free styling poetry and to me if the poem does not rhyme, I do not feel it. And as for having the rank of (skilled level) as a critic, I always refrain from reviewing any free styling poetry. But I did relate to his poem and I thought that for the first piece this was excellent. So I thought I'd send it to the critics for judging the quality of his work, and I got the following reviews:

The poem:

the dove

The dove, white and pure, enters the room
three steps on the floor, across the hall
stares at the lady from below, wondering, poundering
who might she be, why is she so alone, why?

The dove, white and pure, jumps above
sitting on her shoulder, across her face
pinches the lady from aside, wondering, poundering
who might she be, why is she so alone, why?

The dove, white and pure, opens its wings
cloaks her face, across her eyes
Light, light, light, light, light
No more wondering, no more loneliness, no more, no more.... no more.
Copyright: Purgatory72, 2004

Critics review:

Review:
I like the dove and light but I do not understand its meaning. Keep trying. I would like to say that when I first started writing I was not so good but now I am here.
Rated:2/5
Reviewed by
Re'ann
(Scholar Level)

Review:
I love it! This has questions makes me think thought provoking me into action . expressions are so unique. I like rants and it is close Yes. awesome poem
Rated:5/5
Reviewed by
Nila
(National Judge Advocate)

Review:
I like this poem... i enjoyed reading it, although I don't see the meaning of it... it honestly leaves me blank
Rated:3/5
Reviewed by
kandiekane
(Talented Level)

Review:
This poem leaves me wondering...like the dove I need to ask why? I can pull no certain meaning from this piece and do not feel qualified to try.
Rated:2/5
Reviewed by
(Master Level)Krinnchic

Review:
i respect the effort... change "poundering" to "pondering"... the thing that held me to the context of the poem is the idea that the angel of death, or even the grim reaper, is now represented by a dove... good enough for me... great...
Rated: 4/5

Reviewed by
venancio
(Professional Level)

Review:
I like the dove and all but I think there need to be more understanding put in to the poem
Rated: 2/5
Reviewed by
sheaharts
(Experienced Level)

Review:
An interesting poem. It leaves one
wondering and pondering (check your spelling) just like the dove, so white and pure. It's not a bad poem, just a little
different than the norm. Always try different things - it helps you grow.
Rated: 4/5
Reviewed by
Bethie
(National Judge Advocate)

This is the ranks levels from lowest to highest:

Scholar Level
Experienced Level
Skilled level
Talented Level
Professional Level
Master Level
National Judge Advocate

Now I'm not going to say more Purg. Let the results speak for themselves.
And to those of you who feel that they have this ability and talent, and can appreciate the written word and have the yearning to pour out their feelings on a piece of paper, please don't be shy just do it, there is always a first time.
Ching ching
Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 2:02 PM:: 21 comments

Friday, October 15

Friends Give you Synergy.


At last she's back. My best friend that is. Ever since she's been gone I have hardly left home if not to take care of some errands. Today she was here and it felt so good.
Friends are really the god blessed treasures of life. Your whole personality changes when they are around. The first thing she did is hug me and carry me off the ground. And I found myself talking like a non stop stereo, wanting to let everything out in mixed up sentences, not wanting to miss anything, same was with her. Our mobiles kept ringing and we just ignored the callers. Nothing is more important than us being together again.
Family is important, but you don't choose them, so you have to take them good or bad. But friends are different; you choose them and you put up with them as much as they put up with you, but you do it whole heartedly. You could pass time with them without feeling how time passes by. And there is always something to talk about. They give you synergy.
For the last two summers we traveled together, done some foolish stuff together, but this year our bosses played a trick on separating us by allowing each a different vacation timing, so basically we were separated for 'bout one month and a half. And that's a long time for close friends.
And tonight I know she will practically drag me out of my dungeon. She already made the plan. I don't mind, so long she is with me. I won't miss my blog, nor would I miss my poems, or my books, not even eager to check my critic's sight "a task I've been doing day and night"
Welcome back sweetie, nowerat leq8.
Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 7:58 PM:: 7 comments

Thursday, October 14

Tattoo


A bit more than two years back I had a tattoo of a Yin and Yang, which basically means balance, to have balance in my life. I've always been an extremist and needed this balance soooo bad, when I'm in love I go head over toe, when I'm hurt from someone I disappear from his/her lifer for good… and so on. So I thought may be with adding this symbol on my $%^&* things will change. And things did change; my life became a total chaos and as a result I lost my peace of mind. That's why I'm planning to have another tattoo a bit lower, on the center of gravity of my body. This time I chose the "ohm" symbol shown in the picture above. This symbol represents peace. May be, just may be thing will change for me.

Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 1:00 AM:: 12 comments

Monday, October 11

To Anonymous


Sometime back I had a mail from a friend that contained a poem from an anonymous. This poem had moved me so much and I would like to share it:

Empty Glass

So many nights I spent alone,
Surrounded by the crowd.
My silent memories haunting
With the music playing loud.

Holding on to broken dreams,
Drinking with my friends.
Forgetting every song they played,
They never seemed to end.

People dancing all around,
While I sat on my stool.
Making toasts that no one heard
And feeling like a fool.

Take a drink to loneliness,
Have a drink on me.
Gaze into the empty glass,
Tell me what you see.

Reflections of a broken heart,
Beating out of tune.
Fill it up again my friend,
I must be leaving soon.

Closing time is drawing near,
So pour another round.
Almost crying time again
Unless the memories drown.

One last drink to emptiness,
I feel it closing in.
The glowing warmth of nothingness
Has saved me once again.

I've looked at life in may ways,
But lived it all in dreams.
Escaping from a senseless fear
Of life's realities.

Now I find myself alone,
Imprisoned by the past.
Viewing life through silent tears
And another empty glass.

Share just one more drink with me,
And I'll be going home.
I love to have a drink with friends,
But I have to cry alone

Now this is the message" my poem" I wish I could pass to anonymous:

When I'm alone and jaded
When no where I call home
I crumble in a solemn shell
And silence recites your poem

Copyright :Ruby, 2004
Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 3:55 PM:: 19 comments

Saturday, October 9

G-Sring



Got this e-mail yesterday

LOLFUN /What Religion Is Your Bra?

And it got me thinking;
How come bras have cup sizes, but panties don't.
S, M and L are sizes for hips. What if you have small hips but large butt, or large hips and small butts? I know that some companies avoide that by inventing G-Strings. But not everyone can stand those. They're so annoying at times; they tend to squeeze into the crack and you'd be swaying around like a dancer pretending that nothing is wrong while you're actually trying to get that string out of your butt by rubbing against a chair or a wall when someone is around. Or, just go to a secluded place and move it out of the crack, pull it aside, and sigh. But those cursing devils are so stubborn that they move back into the crack as soon as someone shows up.
And the aftermath is another story; when you take them off you have to wash off those brawny flakes that are stuck to them before throwing them into the washing machine. By the time you're done you are ready to puke.
So the companies invented another way to release the pressure a bit and invented the G-Sting pad; scented pads, breathable pads" give me a break" and so on. This pad became more of a burden than the string itself; now not only you have to pull the string aside but also you have to worry about the pad that is glued to one side of the string and to the butt on the other side. but hey women we don't care, right. They look sexy especially when the top liner peeks out of the pants; it shows how up-to-date and stylish we are, and the agonies we go through! Hell who cares it's confidential.
Posted by Hello


Posted by AyyA:: at :: 4:17 PM:: 19 comments

3abd El-routine


As much as I cherish my freedom, and hate routines, and avoid planning ahead, I find myself hooked to certain errands and rituals that set the hours of my days and the days of my week.
Ok, working hours is mandatory, yoga sessions, also mandatory. But how about the time that I have for myself? I tend to have a special time for reading, a special time for writing; I sit in the same place in the living room. Not only that but when I visit family and friend, I unconsciously sit in the same place. And if I find that that apace is already occupied by someone else, I drop in another place and wait till that place gets vacated so I can jump in. this also includes the chair I use for dining, the side of the bed I sleep in; always to the left. And oh, the chair I use in the meeting room; that becomes really frustrating when I find it occupied by another colleague, I develop this sense of resentment toward this person throughout the meeting; how dare he invade what is rightfully mine?
And when someone drops in at a time my heart is set on something; even if he's a dear person to my heart, my mind keeps buzzing, and what a relief it is when he leaves. Now I'm not talking 'bout serious things or urgent things that can't wait.
That's why I need a vacation once and a while. Not from my work, and not from people around, I need it to get away from myself coz I HATE routine.
Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 7:51 AM:: 10 comments

Friday, October 8

Tonight is the night for partying


Posted by Hello
Ok so I'm getting the hang on it :P

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 5:28 AM:: 4 comments

Thursday, October 7




Eternity
 Posted by Hello

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 2:24 AM:: 8 comments

Monday, October 4

A challenging Personality Test

Testing your ability to analyze personality:
Do you have the ability to analyze someone's personality by reading a piece he wrote?
This is an example:
Well, sometime back someone which I have never seen in my life had read one of my poems and analyzed my personality; the poem and the analysis are shown below:

Fetching Love

Hand me wine and a joyous coddle
Salute me with your bottle
For nothing can drift my mind away
Noisy around, my world is subtle

As I rise my crystal cup
All emotions would drop
On rouge liquid around the rim
My thoughts voyages to him
Is this his dreamy eyes!
In my cup I visualize
Or just a mere hallucination
I crave to fantasize

On the beat of music flow
I care less who come, who go
Rising rhythms in my veins
Rock me as it starts to grow
Causing thunderous inner beat
From my head down to my feet

Then just as smoke all memories vanish
While I dance, twirl, and flourish

Then I return to my seat
Exhausted by the torturous heat
I rise my cup for more sips
And a kiss to his luscious lips

He takes me in his arms to tango
And flows with the Latino lingo
On music so soft and mellow
His shoulder becomes my pillow

Then again I'm lost in track
I want my beloved back
My heart wrenches with each sigh
Ember I carry on my back

I'm fetching him in a maze
In a room full of haze
My cheerful front surely amaze
All who know I'm in a blaze

And this is the personality analysis:
Self-centered
Sensitive
Emotionally challenged,
Cultured
Mature
Indifferent
Expressive
Decisive
Tolerant.

I'm not going to tell you how accurate his analysis was, so that I won't give you a hint.
This is a test for you to read my poem in the previous post "does it matter" and try to analyze my personality through reading. I will not comment though, the results would be disclosed on the next posting, and I'll keep the feedback.


Posted by AyyA:: at :: 2:22 PM:: 4 comments

Sunday, October 3

Does it matter!

So what if I've lost again
Sometimes losing is a gain
The wheel must go on spinning
It doesn't wait for those in pain

There were things I didn't see
When I was wrapped up in thee
Or shall I say immensely melted,
Blinded, drowned in your dazzling sea

Now you come, you go or whatever
Be you cold, be you warm,
Be you a changing weather
Now, you just don’t matter

All night, sound asleep the pillow I hug
Underneath it my hand is deeply tuck
I stretch out form head to feet
Till toe reaches the end of sheet
you just don’t matter

Farewell, loss, and farewell I beg you
Stop hunting my pillow
If loss was easy to recover
Then when will you cease to matter

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 5:06 PM::

Saturday, October 2

Back to "Just a plain disposable lighter":

Here are all the critic's reviews I received in my mail so far about my last poem " Just a plain disposable lighter", I did not rewrite or change any wording, I just copied and pasted the comments::


Review1:
First time reading, I automatically notice the following: too many quotation marks, some not necessary; question marks, whereas a period or exclamation mark can replace; author should use a spell-check - we all make mistakes, but still... should not! Why the asterisks between paragraphs - not necessary; overall, good poem and meaningful - needs to be edited by someone else for punctuations, spelling, etc. - to me, it's extremely important - even one word can throw-of the meaning of the entire poem.

Reviewed by
Yana
Rated 2/5

Review 2:
EXCELLENT!!!! Excellent manipulation of negative & positive imagery! It has excellent descriptive tone! The metaphor finale was brilliant! The repetitiveness really hits home. Makes the reader feel what this person would be feeling. Overall very good!!.

Reviewed byLisa-Marie
Rated 5/5

Review3:
First class. Wonderful comparison combined with an easily read story which incorporates everything the reader needs to know Highly enjoyable

Reviewed by
slowerairs
Rated 4/5


As for the spelling mistakes; the first critic was referring to the spelling of the word "Kama Sutra" which I fixed later to "Karma Sutra", but thanks to my friend FCM, who gave me a link to a Karma Sutra site and this is what I found out "as was quoted in that site":

"In this webpage we have used the common spelling 'karma sutra'. Alternative spellings include 'karmasutra, kama sutra, kamasutra and kama shastra' "

And as for my punctuation; the great poet Pushkin, author of "Boris Godunov" and "Eugene Onegin", and the originator of much of the Russian literary tradition was always criticized for his grammar, but he never cared so long that thousands were enjoying his poetry.

Now I don't mean to compare myself to Pushkin; the critics can be of great help. But what I'm trying to do is to reach to you and find out how is my poem felt in public, because you are the ones I'm writing for. I'm still waiting for more comments on my last poem, and genuine criticism is mostly appreciated.

Posted by AyyA:: at :: 3:24 PM:: 3 comments