Wednesday, September 28
For an Easy lazy WeekendThis post is dedicated to you
In my last post about photography , I had many commentators with a know-how in photography and/or Photoshop who have been a great help in developing my newly found hobby. And I also received e-mails from others that preferred to stay incognito and still provided their invaluable help; hey, thanks to all of you, I’m practically doing an online distant learning in photography, now isn’t that sweet :)
Results of class one:
Tariq; is that a good composition? :D
Fishermen at dawn
Sunrise
This is to Mr. Moon himself, now this was the hardest :D
Yes Misguided; they’re two pictures. :DSo what do you think?
Off course Purgy and Elegance, this dedication is to you too :D
------------------------------------------------------------
A "me" time
Only an hour
Let me fill you
I have all the time in the world
For you
But before you come
Make sure you give me an hour
Just one hour
You see
I have to be super delicious
My hair has to be the locks of fire
Just the way you desire
My kohl attended
For your attendance
My skin smoothly creamed
Worthy of your kiss
Worthy of your caress
Yes, I have to be the right feast
For the super special beast
I have to be that or else
I will have to stop seeing you
Ok now join me in this game for the weekend, remember; stick to the title" Only an Hour" and write whatever you feel, in any language, whatever the poem or title inspires, do it and make my day.
Remember no judgment here and feel at home.
Have a happy weekend evrybody.
Tuesday, September 27
Sameera / the struggle of a single woman “VII"
A continuation
A shred of hope:
That night Alberto walked her to her car and their conversation continued for more than an hour beside her car as if none of them wanted to say goodbye. But in the end when she finally said the dreaded word, Alberto approached to give her a goodnight kiss.
As he got closer, his eyes searching her lips, Sameera involuntarily closed her eyes in an anticipation to feel Alberto’s lips on hers, her heart started rapidly pounding and her entire body trembled at his touch as he drew her closer to him.
But to her shock, she only felt a quick kiss on one cheek barely touching the corner of her lips; an unexpected act that bulged her eyes wide open in response, and in the process she noticed the embracement on Alberto’s face who was trying to avoid her stare and started blabbing some fare well wishes before walking back to the party, and without thinking, she dashed herself in the car and quickly drove away wishing in her heart to vanish from his sight, as if she was running away from her shame and her humiliating embarrassment.
On her way home, and as she became able to contain herself, she automatically called Fowziya, who was still in the party, and she sarcastically told her of what a fool she had made of herself amidst tears of embarrassment and regret that fowziya couldn’t decide if she was actually aware of what she was saying or was it the booze talking.
For the next few days Sameera could not think straight; at night she tossed and turned in bed unable to push the dark thoughts off of her mind, and during the day she just wanted to forget the whole thing and never talked about Alberto again; she had never been more humiliated in her life, what happened was a slap on the face that woke her up to face the harsh reality of the myth she created in her mind; Alberto was never interested in her, and she probably was unintentionally too pushy and this intensified her fears to face Alberto again.
Few nights later, and as she was attempting to get some sleep her mobile rang, she guessed the late caller was most probably Marwan; those kids never give up do they? She struggled to free one hand from the tumbled sheets around her body and reached out for it, in the dark, in an effort to silence the noisy device, but when her eyes saw the flashing “Alberto”, her whole body jerked in one movement to a seated position and the mobile fell off of her hand and landed under the night stand.
She immediately jumped out of bed, stretched one hand under the small table, and in her haste not to end the call she pushed the talk button before retrieving the phone, it took a while to place the mobile receiver on her ear and hear Alberto on the other end yelling :” hello, hellllloooo, are you there”
Sameera:” yes, yes, I can hear you” and she sighed; (oh thanks God he’s still on).
Alberto:” I’m sorry, did I wake you up?”
Sameera:” no, I was not asleep” (are you kidding? You can wake me up anytime you gorgeous you).
Alberto: “well I could not go to sleep, so I thought I’d call you up to punish you for being the cause of my insomnia.. hahahaaaa”
Sameera:” oh really, ha …how’s that?” (oh my God now he’s going to talk about that night, I shouldn’t have picked up the phone, no I don’t want to hear another word about that night).
Alberto:” I don’t know how to say this, it’s really embarrassing”
Sameera:” is everything OK?” (yeh tell me about it, the embarrassment is all mine dude).
Alberto:” you know I’ve been living with my girl for three years now”
Sameera with tightened lips:” yeh, the one you’re engaged to be married to” (you did not call in the middle of the night to discuss your girlfriend!!!! offffff, ya dil girlfriend elli mo hadatna fi 7alna)
Alberto:” actually we’re not engaged, we have postponed that”
Sameera:” oh, really? I thought you said..” Now she’s wide awake.
Alberto:” yes, but before leaving for her vacation, we had decided to wait on any serious commitment and not rush things”
Sameera;” I see” (hmmmmmm nice development)
Alberto:” well, before meeting you I was sure that I was in love with her although our love boat did not always sail as peacefully as we had hoped. But after seeing you I have experienced a weird kind of pull; it’s like there were some vibes in the air that drew me to you, and ever since this happened I’m not so sure if I want to be with my girlfriend; if I love her, then why is this happening to me, and I sensed the same feelings from you, but I’m not sure of my feelings anymore and I’m not the type that can do that to any person, I mean, when I commit I want to be a loyal, devoted person, soul has always been more important to me than body, and I can feel you in my soul and this has never happened to me before, do I make any sense?”
Sameera:” ah, I’m not sure exactly, no?” (oh my, oh my, this is getting better).
Alberto:” I mean, I’m so attracted to you and if I’m with another girl, this shouldn’t happen, but from that first night I felt this thing for you and I also sensed this vibration coming from you and I’m puzzled”
Sameera:” ah… to be honest with you, I had this feeling as if I had known you all my life” (now l have to ease a bit before I make a fool of myself again) “but I know you are with another girl and I can’t see myself building my happiness by ruining someone else’s” (now why the hell did I say that).
Alberto:” yeh, I know what you mean and I repect you more for this, I just wanted to be clear and sure about this, but believe me it’s beyond me; I don’t want to loose you nor ignore my strong feelings toward you and regret it later, at the same time I don’t want to hurt my girl, she is a sweetheart and she does not deserve this from me”
Sameera:” well, I guess you have to decide what you want to do, and believe me if you decide to stay with your girlfriend and that would make you happy, I’d be happy for you despite my feelings towards you” (now would I really?)
The conversation did not last much longer before saying their goodnights, but Sameera’s heart was contented and she peacefully slept that night with a shred of hope. Now she’s sure that she was not imaging things as Fowziya was constantly trying to convince her and that the feeling between her and Alberto was indeed mutual as she had sensed the first time they met, but he had to decide now which one would he rather not loose; his long time girlfriend or her, at the same time she felt a surge of guilt, and tried to convince herself that if Alberto chose to be with his girlfriend, she would surly understand, and would admire him even more, or at least that’s what she was trying to fool herself to lighten the quilt that started burdening her chest, this nasty uncomfortable feeling that made her feel unworthy and trash.
Next morning Alberto called and set a date to meet up with her for dinner to discuss things, the phone call was formal and quick since both of them were in their offices, but Sameera thought that it was the most romantic thing that happened to her in a long time despite her guilt, and she started debating in her mind what was she going to wear for that very special date, she wanted to look hot and sexy even though she knew that Alberto wanted her soul and not her body.
It was weird and out of character for a man to seek a soul rather than a body, Alberto did not deceive her, he did not look the type that would fool a girl into his bed. But the hot attire was out of question since she knew she could not do that for an early dinner, why did he choose it to be an early dinner? and why in a public place where she might easily run into family or friends? Why wouldn’t Alberto invite her to his place where they could have their privacy away from curious eyes just like all other men she’d known? After all, he knew her weakness towards him, he could easily use her vulnerability to his advantage, and may be in her subconscious mind she wanted him to do that, but Alberto was different; he was a man who believed in spiritual bonds rather than the physical fulfillment, a man who would go for a long term relationship rather than a passing fling. And that was the strongest reason for her to get more attached to him; he was curiously unique.
The dinner was a very pleasant experience; although it did not go as she had expected. Alberto did not talk about his feelings, nor did he mention anything about his girlfriend, rather their discussion diverted to cover aspects of supernatural powers, life and death, the universal energies and Tarot’s reading which he claimed he could read. He did promise though that sometime soon he’d read the cards for her, but he never mentioned when or where.
But while they were having dinner, Waleed called Alberto to see what he was up to, and very innocently Alberto mentioned that he was having dinner with Sameera. And since Alberto comes from a different culture than Waleed’s he did not know that by his statement he is starting a big dilemma for Sameera without him realizing it.
To be continued
Monday, September 26
Male Sex PsychologyAlfie; a funny character, a gigolo and a womanizer that you’d fall in love with despite his character, he flies from one female nest to another, trying to get what he wants from each with special skills and wits, he is not a bad guy though, he loves all his women; each to a certain degree.. or was it?
As I was watching this movie my mind drifted away and I started thinking, how many men I’ve met in my life that did not have a part of Alfie in him? And to my surprise; hardly any! And some stay an Alfie all their lives.
And as the over rated wedding night is a dream comes true for women, so is Alfie to most men. Or to put it in a different phrase; women go primitively into a relationship to get married …..period, while most men would only go for a fling and any sign of commitment drives them away, and the Casanova remains uncommitted until the day he finds himself paying to get just a company of a female, any female, and I have witnessed a few that ended pathetically.
And that thought diverted me to male sex psychology; why is it easy for most men to fall in love with more than one woman while women can’t? So I tried to put myself in their shoes to be able to see the other side of the fence, or better yet wear their shoes, take their rules and apply them to me; a woman.
What if I had dated two or three men separately at the same time? Where no one of them knew about the other, but mind you, it’s not like I’d make out with one and *(&) the other the day after, no, more like when one disappears for some reason or another, there is a replacement and therefore no psychological attachment to any.
And the result; I’m the strongest in all the relationships and nothing can make me commit to any one of them, they all go by my rules.
That paragraph above didn’t sound very comforting, did it? But remember whose shoe I’m having on, so bear with me a bit longer.
As a woman I strive for committing to one, I date one and he’s my main man, but I have to abide by the rule; if I stay with him long enough, I’ll eventually get attached, so what do I need?.. a distraction.
Some might say get more involved in your business or find a hobby or something, but that doesn’t quite work, I need an equal distraction, I need another man, and remember I did not date the first man long enough to be in love or anything, I’m just beginning to get attached.
And so I date another after fabricating a fight with the first. A new face, a new look, new friends and most importantly; a new experience which has its own joy.
And when I really miss the first, by hook or crock, I get him back. But this time I come back stronger because I have guaranteed his replacement in case things did not work between us.
But as I stay longer with him my initial fear of attachment starts to grow again, so I start looking for…..my distraction or a new one.
Hmmmmmm
Could this be the reason behind the pagan that a man is emotionally equipped to have more than one wife and to be able to love them equally while woman can’t?
Could it be that between a handful of women a man dates he cares for all of them to a certain degree but psychologically is attached to one that he subconsciously fears and that’s why he has to keep himself …..distracted?
Does that explain why some happily married men still keep mistresses?
Is that why some other men panic at the first sign of commitment? Is it because they’re more committed mentally than what they want to believe?
Any brainstorming here?
Sunday, September 25
Dignity
Babo was the Minister’s personal driver, a dark small boned short Indian man with a permanent smile that glittered his face. He was the big guy in the Ministry (sayig elwazeer, wazeer), full of confidence and everybody would hush when Babo was around since he was very close to the Minister.But unlike “the Undersecretary” position which is almost always a permanent one, the Minister’s term ended and as a result Babo was transferred to my department to take a bellboy’s position; the lowest rank at the mercy of all the employees in the department, and as a result Babo lost his car and his smile.
It took a long time for Babo to get readjusted; before his transfer every one treated him as if he was the Minister and now they just ordered him around, Babo lost his dignity.
I knew that this was not Babo’s job, he was a driver with over twenty yeas of experience in handling inside and outside liaisons; he almost knew all the key personnel in all other government sectors and he knew how to handle document flow which was and still is the biggest problem facing government sectors where a lot of important documents are lost due to mishandling paper flow. The new Minister that transferred him did not test his capabilities and his credentials, he did not need to, he brought his own staff and Babo became just another head that he wanted to discard.
A while after his transfer I promised Babo to give him his position back and to assign him as my personal driver, I could not give him that responsibility until I accommodated the department with his replacement as a bellboy.
And I was up to my promise, Babo became my personal driver and he restored his old position, his car, his smile and most importantly his dignity. And mind you; I did not do it for him; I did it because I needed his know-how in his field.
That was twelve yeas back, and whenever I transferred from one department to another, Babo was to transfer with me along with my old-time secretary whom together made a dynamic team I could not have done without.
Babo could never forget this; even now that I quit my job for almost a year, Babo is still offering his services, and for free. He refuses to take a penny from me, his wife Helen cooks and he surprises me with her dishes every once and a while although he can hardly feed his own family. He almost calls four times a week to make sure that I’m OK and still offers his services insisting that I’m still his boss.
TO WIN A PERSON GIVE HIM/HER HIS/HER DIGNITY ……
TO WIN NATIONS GIVE THEM THEIR DIGNITY….
Monday, September 19
Yesterday Came
Yesterday cameWhen I saw his face
And along withered joys
It brought his grace
We did not have to bear
Not a shred of pain
Nor regrets
Could make us refrain
Our eyes embraced
Out hearts found their way
As if yesterday
Had never gone away
Tell yesterday
“Come again tomorrow”
For no place is left
In our hearts.. for sorrow
A later edition:
This poem was written in a kind of game on a site for “the poets to be”, the rule of the game is choosing a title, any title and then ask others to write anything that relates to the title. And see who gets the most stars from the critics who could be anyone visiting the site.
Ok now let’s play this game :
I will chose a title from one of my older poems “ To You ”, I want you now to write whatever inspiration you get from the title or from the poem and write it down, there will be no judgments here, you are free to write whatever comes to mind, no restrictions what so ever, you only have to stick to the title and it doesn’t have to be a poem, a paragraph will do and you can chose to write it in Arabic or English. Just let it flow.
Yall bad3ow
Sunday, September 18
My New Hobby
Last year, around this time, I got me my first digital camera, a compact Sony cyber-shot 5M pixels, and with it my photography whim started, it was not until about six months back that I started fooling around with its different programs, in a trial and error method to capture the right view. Mind you, I hate reading manuals.One thing frustrated me though, is that I could not actually capture what I had in mind, the view I see with naked eye is different from that on the camera especially when I’m shooting at night.
So I decided may be my newly acquired talent (e7em) is outgrowing its breeches, may be a new, more professional camera is due.
So I got me this Sony, cyber-shot, DSC-V3, 4X zoom with a facility for night shots, it’s a kind of in-between compact and professional camera, and for the first time in my life I’m reading the instruction manual and shooting everything I get my hands on, just like a little kid who’s happy with his long awaited toy.
These pictures shown are taken with my old camera, some of them I had to enhance with photo shop; thanks to sweet Purgy who had started me on gear :)
Take a look and tell me what do you think?
Serenity
The pallet
The warning
The Wroth
Protection
I have uploaded a lot more on flicker, so if you are up to it, then give it a shot
The revised photos
The Mercy
Fantasy
The Pallet
Friday, September 16
What’s in a Massage?Most of us have tried to take a massage of some sorts and we all know how does that refreshes, relaxes and vitalizes us, but have you ever thought what massage does to you when you give one?
Reflexology goes back in history to ancient China and the pharaohs where Mark Anthony was historically noted to rub Cleopatra’s feet at dinner parties.
And although hand reflexology is not as popular as foot reflexology but it’s equally effective, your hand represents a map of all the organs in your body and by stimulating special pressure points you activate chi to all body organs therefore curing and healing any malfunction in the body in addition to relaxing your mind click here to learn more.
So by giving a massage, any sort of massage, you are actually activating these pressure points and doing wonders to yourself.You do not have to be an expert in massaging so long you know that you have to engage your entire palm and your fingers in the process and work patiently on muscles, not bones. The main thing is to concentrate solely on what you’re doing and feel the energy flow from your hands to the recipient’s body, and once you do that, you can actually feel the energy recycling from you to the recipient and back.
If you have a partner, this act can actually boost your sexual life, yes it works better than Viagra and it’s natural, try it in a candle lit room with some stress relief Incense, it can also be an excellent form of foreplay, but if you don’t, then massaging family and friends would be as equally rewarding, not sexually though, so be careful not to get carried away :p
And if you do not have anyone, just go cobblestone walking and sing “ lonely table just for one” :)
Wednesday, September 14
Penang; a Malaysian Island !!!!A place that I could say that I did not like much, the tropical nature was awesome, when I first drove from the airport it looked like the clean, green, exotic Singapore, going towards the mountain area it reminded me of Knoxville, Tennessee where you hardly see land from it’s vast green forests with the exception of the type of trees that covered the whole area, and on the beach resort I felt like I was on Leonardo DiCaprio’s “The Beach”.
Then why didn’t I like it? Three reasons where hereunder I will specify:
1- It’s greedy people; sorry to say that but this impression I got from the minute we got accommodated in the hotel, it seems to me that these people are experts in botching the tourists, especially the Kuwaitis and Saudis who were in bundles in this small island. Can’t say more because I’m really disgusted with their crockery. Add to the fact that this country is of the majority of Moslems and therefore not much of a night life, and not that I care much about that, but the streets were practically dead after eight PM. And the restriction you feel when you stroll around, that’s if you could, is not very comforting and not safe.
2- Although the nature is heavenly, it’s not used properly to attract tourists, for instance the only means of transportation was a car. Stretches of empty beaches that are not used, even the hotel that we stayed in which was supposed to be a five star beach resort, you only find some foreigners on the swimming pool and the beach area is not properly equipped; no coffee shops nor beach beds or anything, and no walkways for the pedestrians from the hotel to the surrounding areas, everywhere you want to go you had to rent a car or hail for a taxi, add to that the high rise buildings that were not in harmony and blocked the vision from enjoying the surrounding nature; The tourist industry is really pathetic.
3- The Malaysian food was more like Indian food with loads of spices only not as good as the Indian's, more like dinning in a bad Indian restaurant even in the most sophisticated places.
Add to all the above; the weather was hot and humid!!!
One thing that really appealed to me was the freedom to practice religion in this place; you’d see mosques, churches and Temples side by side.
Would I repeat the visit? No way; three days were more than enough, I was simply…. Bored to death. But as I said the nature was heavenly; judge from these photos:
Exotic tree where stems spring off of its trunk and ends in a wad of perfumed flowers, don’t know what it’s called, but I have never seen anything like it, you can see a zoomed shot of the flower on the right.
Giant butterflies
Fresh nutmeg
Cable car, built recently by the Swiss; nothing like the old ones you take for Mount Pilatus, the difference? Very primitive and unorganized.
Penang; a view from the top of the mountain
A young fellow that greeted us on the streets with his family running loose in the wild; so cute :)
A Buddhist temple
A mosque
An Indian temple
Saturday, September 10
Could you be friends with your ex?
A question that enforced itself so many times on my mind;If you had a long term relationship with someone and then for some reason you broke up but you still had feelings for each other, what will you do? Will you just stay away and forget him/her? Then how would you react if you run into him/her with someone else? Or would you rather keep your friendship and accept the new person in his/her life? And how do you think that this is possible?
I’ll leave you with that and fly to Malaysia, see you soon when I’m back in Kuwait, take care.
PS; the painting is “ Lonely” by Therdkiat Wangwarcharakul
Friday, September 9
Siam; The Land of WoundersOk guys enough of the weird jokes of that last post; let’s have some real laughs
Chips are used and recycled in the underground instead of paper; how neat, no that's not my hand, I'm the one taking the picture, remenber!
The Arabic quarter in Bangkok
The God that frightens the evil spirits away
God of fertility; notice how it has a woman’s body with a penis that she is holding ;)
A gypsy lady boy
A retired lady boy; I know what you’re thinking; I’m evil LOL
Eucalyptus; a lady boy show in Asia hotel competes with Paris’s Lido, if those shown in the picture are guys, then I as sure as hell need a sexual transplant LOL
Thursday, September 8
BONSAI CATSI got this disturbing mail from a friend, it’s so sickening to see how human beings can be so cruel, and I ask the ones who are into this business; how would anyone of them like to become a Bonsai man / woman?
The E-mail:
This is so terrible. A site that we were able to shut last year has returned.
We have to try to shut it down. A Japanese man in New York breeds and sells kittens that are called BONSAI CATS. That would sound cute, if it weren't kittens that were put into little bottles after being given a muscle relaxant and then locked up for the rest of their lives!! The cats are fed through a straw and have a small tube for their faces. The skeleton of the cat will take on the form of the bottle as the kitten grows.
The cats never get the opportunity to move. They are used as original and exclusive souvenirs. These are the latest trends in New York, China, Indonesia and New Zealand. If you think you can handle it, view this and have a look at the methods being used to put these little kittens into bottles.
I have to warn you; the site is disturbing
Wednesday, September 7
Hurricane Katrina; A Cry That Was Not Heard on Time
It's really puzzling why the US government did not rush to rescue its citizens in New Orleans; we hear many stories and it still remains a mystery, if I were American I would demand a full report on the incident although there is no excuse for government’s slow response and I would also demand that all the responsible ones be punished for this, if the government had responded earlier than it had a lot lives could have been saved and the tragedy would not have been escalated the way it did.I feel for all the victims and pray that they would be compensated for their loss.
Here is a heart wrenching story that I stumbled upon while surfing the net, a live story of during and after the hurricane, it kinda reminded me of the early days of the invasion of my country when we used to listen to the radio and watch TV for any caring ear, and how disappointed we were when none were even mentioning the invasion.
Michael Homan’s Cry
Tuesday, September 6
I Love you
I love your tender heartI know how deep it is
I love your childish smile
Even when it’s a pretence
I love your wild looks
With million promises in its essence
I love your youth
When hard through me you commence
I love to listen to you
Even when my mind is in absence
I love the way you experiment with me
As a teacher learning from his own apprentice
I love the way you make love to me
And spin my head to a deep silence
But mind you
I’m not in love with you
Love's too conventional
But you’re not
Monday, September 5
A Far Eastern FlavorAlthough this is my sixth visit to Thailand, this place never ceases to amaze me; I’m so taken by its culture; I try my best to mingle with Thai people to be able to understand the way they think.
Several years back when I first decided to visit this country, some people advised me against it, they said that the place is so dirty and is full of prostitutes and the only people who visit Thailand are the dirty old men looking for cheap sex with young girls.
And although that made me hesitant at the beginning, I finally decided to come see for myself the land of “ The King and I “and I never regretted it. And although I’ve been meaning to visit country sights in Thailand every time I visited, I have found myself spending my time in Bangkok; there is so much to see.
I haven’t been able to go around much in this visit so far because my mother is undergoing her periodic medical check ups for Cancer which we first discovered in this city few years back, she only trusts her own doctor who is one of the finest in the largest Cancer centers in the East located in Bumrungrad Hospital.
The tests are so trying for her weak body and I really feel sorry for her, but by tomorrow we get the results and hopefully all are OK (crossing my fingers) and our real vacation will start.
Let’s now get back to the subject; as I have mentioned earlier, a lot of people I know had warned me from Thailand, but to my surprise, none of them had actually visited and seen the country themselves but still were judgmental.
To me, Thailand is the land of rich culture and maximum extremes; very poor people versus filthy rich people, and along with that you can measure the amount of extremity that follows, very reserved versus very open. Sex is sold on street corners, while a decent kiss is audited on TV, cheap malls that sell copies of the original goods versus state of the art malls that sell brand names. It has every thing that you would want depending on what you are looking for. Here are some pictures that would give you an idea but remember that this is what I could get my hands on so far, there will be more to come inshallah:
Doctor’s waiting room; how pleasant and neat
A Japanese restaurant in the food court of the mezzanine floor of the hospital .... yummy
A view of the hospital foyer from the mezzanine floor
Water lilies
Wana have a foot massage?
The poor selling his cooking right in front of his house on the street which is more like a hut, how content and happy with the little that he’s got
My cabby back to the hotel ( pst. My mom doesn’t know or else she’d kill me LOL)
Saturday, September 3
What the Bleep Do We Know?
A mind provoker, an eye opener, a movie that is worth watching, I will not say more, you have to see it for yourselves, you have to see what we are doing to ourselves, our being. See what a prayer can do to overcome nature’s disasters, and when you do, please pray for the victims of hurricane Katrina, ten minutes of your time is all what you need.
Check this, or better yet; watch the movie
Name::AyyA
From::Kuwait
I AM WHO I AM AS I ARRIVE AT YOUR DOOR WHETHER I COME OR I GO IS NOT UP TO ME FOR I HAVE LOST SIGHT OF ALL DESIRE "Walled Garden of Truth",Hakim Sanai
View my complete profile
